The Local Church

My Personal Testimony

Since about the fourth grade I began asking questions about why things were the way they were and why people are like they are, and I began observing people and what they did in their lives. Eventually, I decided I didn't want to be just another person with a job, family, etc. Even if I was successful, and even wealthy--that ended up with really nothing. I'd just die and the world keep right on going. I wanted my life to be full of purpose, what life was supposed to be “about”. I wanted to be right in the middle of life.

By the time I graduated from high school, I'd talked with a lot of people: high school counselors, old friends, etc. I kept asking questions, but no one I asked, even older people, could tell me what life was supposed to be about. They'd tell me: just do the best you can, find a job you like, and that's your life. That just didn't make sense to me; there had to be more to life than that.

Although I'd always done very well in school, I didn't have any definite plans for going to college because I couldn't see how college could provide any of the answers I was looking for. I'd had enough of school; I wanted to get on with the purpose of life. I took a few courses at the University of Texas at Arlington, but I wasn't serious about them at all. I tried running around with all the other students to see if partying and having fun was what I was missing in my life, since in high school and junior high I'd spent all of my time studying. But honestly, this only made things worse. Everybody else was just chasing after whatever it was that was missing from our lives; some people were even killed while they were supposedly “having fun”.

I'd always been intrigued by travel and adventure and I thought I'd find some answers in someplace besides Arlington, Texas. One summer while I was still in high school, I took a trip to the east coast. Right after high school, I took a trip to San Francisco and Portland, Oregon. Then, about a year later, a traveling circus came through Arlington. I joined it for about two months as they traveled across the southeast. I left the circus in Florida and went back to Arlington. Traveling had been fun, interesting, and adventurous and had somewhat satisfied me, but I was actually glad to be back in Arlington. I thought I would try school again. A friend had told me that I should take some philosophy and sociology courses. Taking these courses showed me that at least somebody other than I had asked some questions before--but still, no real answers were offered. I didn't find answers to the questions I had.

Another friend suggested that I join the military, which really appealed to my sense of adventure. Since I wasn't getting anywhere in college, I decided that I might as well join. I'd have a chance to grow up, travel, and save some money. Hopefully, along the way, I'd find what I was looking for, what I wanted to give my life to. So, I committed myself to two and a half years in the U.S. Navy.

My time in the Navy was more than I bargained for. I went through boot camp and training school in Florida for 11 months. Then, I spent the next 11 months in Okinawa. My last seven months in the Navy were spent doing temporary duty on two aircraft carriers, the USS Enterprise and the USS Coral Sea. I visited Guam, the Philippines, Africa, Korea, Japan, and Hawaii. I learned a great deal, of course, and decided that what might satisfy most of my desires for a fulfilled life would be some type of responsible position in the work to bring all of mankind together in peace and oneness. When I got out of the Navy, I moved to Austin, Texas and enrolled in an international studies program at the University of Texas.

One day after school, as I was walking to a bus stop, a guy walked up beside me and said, “Did you know that Jesus Christ died for your sins?” Without giving it thought, I said “Yes.” I hoped this answer would be enough to keep him from bothering me anymore. We started talking, and I told him about my intentions to work with the United Nations. As we talked, he told me that mankind would never be able to resolve the many differences between all the different nations. His assurance and confidence amazed me. I wasn't shocked to hear someone say man has no hope--I'd heard that before. It was the confidence with which he spoke that was surprising to me. Then, with the same confidence, he went on to say that mankind's only hope was in Jesus Christ. I was really impressed with how real God and the things of God seemed to this man. It was as if he really knew God.

We talked for 20 or 30 minutes. Eventually, we found out we had a mutual friend, a classmate of mine. I agreed to come to dinner about a week later, but told them, “I don't want you jamming Jesus down my throat.” I just wondered how their faith could be so strong when I'd never seen anything so real about God, and how was it that they felt God could get mankind together and that man couldn't do it on his own, when you couldn't know anything for sure about God? I thought about these questions and some others for a whole week and by the time the evening of the dinner came, I had a whole list of questions to ask them.

I believed that there was a God, and I never considered any other God than the one I had heard about in the Bible. I knew very little about the gods offered by other religions, but from what I'd seen they were just too extreme to be the real God. But neither did I know much about the God I claimed to believe in and I'd never thought of looking to God for the answers to my questions. I'd just never thought much about Him. God was someone you looked to when things were going bad, and at other times, you didn't have to give Him much thought. “Do good and be good” was my concept of God and the questions I wanted answers to were much more than that.

On my way to have dinner that night, I sat down and wrote a kind of prayer to the Lord telling Him that he knew all that I had been through and that I was willing to accept whatever it was that He intended to happen that evening. I went on to dinner with my two friends and four more of theirs. It was very enjoyable. They freely talked among themselves about the Lord and things they had been reading in the Bible. Again, I was struck by how real God seemed to them. All of the questions on my list were answered just by observing them and listening to their conversation. God was very real to them. He was neither vague nor distant. The reality, the assurance with which they spoke really attracted me and matched the longing, the seeking for something real I'd had had for so long.

They realized that I liked what I saw and heard--why else would I have come and stayed?--and asked me if I wanted to pray with them so that Jesus Christ the Lord would be real to me, too. I said “no”; I wanted to pray, but not there in front of everybody. But I was able to read the prayer that I'd written earlier that evening. So, I read it, and then I was willing to pray with them. So, we prayed.

From that night, seven years ago, my search ended. That night, I found out that God was very real and he met my every need in a most complete way. Eventually, I found out from reading the Bible that this very real God was building a real church on the earth today made up of those people who have believed in Him and received Him and His redemptive work (1 Peter 1:18-2:5).

A God that I never knew has become so real to me, so near and dear. Christ, the church, the Bible,--have given the meaning to my life that I longed for and searched for. This is what I was made for; without Christ and the Church I am simply incomplete.

M.E. | Back to List

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